As Ben Franklin said, 'In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria.'

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. Coli) - bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.

Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health

Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit .

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service

I admit, I was one once too. Prior to having my own children you would find me looking at parents in the mall or park, or grocery store. I had all sorts of insights to provide them, if only they would ask. "They must give him a full can of soda each morning, how could anyone have that much energy?" is what I thought of some kids. "Don't reward him for that behavior", I would think to another. "Who runs the show at that house?" I would wonder to another.

Since becoming a parent, my outlook has changed. I empathize more than criticize. I realize they all have their moments, just like adults. We have good days and bad, and sometimes just need to eat and take a nap. Sometimes we just need alone time, or some time with Daddy.

The boys and I went grocery shopping today. I normally look forward to this outing with them. Little Man helps pick out items and The Babe helps put them in the cart. Today was no exception, all was going as planned, until The Babe saw the yogurt!

The Babe, being all of 20 months, still hasn't found all of his words. When he wants something he usually signs and says the word "more". Today he broke my heart while it melted when he added the word please and used the sign. He knows how to work it.

I have been known to let the boys eat while we shop. Who doesn't dip into the grapes, or open a box of trail mix while meandering down the aisles deciding what to have for the next meal, which is usually within the hour. Since yogurt is not on my approved list of items to eat while shipping, I tried to divert The Babe's attention to string cheese. "Do you think I am dumb woman?" is what the look that he gave me said.

A woman in her grandmother years was in the aisle with us and started to giggle. I mistakenly took this giggle as one of empathy but I was wrong. I soon heard her say "I'm glad those aren't my children". Although I too, was happy they were not her children, I laughed and said something to the effect of "You would think I didn't feed them". We parted ways. The three of us and the woman. Not me and the boys.

We see the woman again a few aisles later. The Babe had calmed down but the annoying attention he is getting from the woman makes him a little irritated and begins to whine. He is, after all, hungry and I did not give into to his yogurt whine so she is just a reminder of this fact. We part ways again.

The Babe calms down with some string cheese and we check out. Little Man helps place things on the counter while The Babe flirts with the checker. All is well again. We head to the in-store Starbucks after Little Man informs me we have been very good at the store and Mommy deserves a White Chocolate Mocha. I kid you not, he said that. He also added that he would like some milk and a donut. He orders for us; again, I kid you not. Tall nonfat WC Mocha for Mommy and too Chocolate milks for the boys. Here she is again. This time she notes the milks and says "Looks like you won this one buddy", she says while looking at The Babe. "Mommy shouldn't reward you for that kind of behavior". I love it when people talk to me through my kids.

In unusual form, I looked at her and said "It is too bad we have to be parents to be grandparents isn't it, being a grandparent is so much easier".

I was running errands the other day and noticed a sign at a local bar that said "free beer yesterday". (Who hasn't stopped for a drink in the middle of the afternoon?) The sign got me thinking about my blog. OK, I was already thinking about my blog but I thought the sign would be appropriate here too. Like me, the bar is just attempting to be funny. Obviously the bar doesn't give out drinks for free and I don't give out good content on a regular basis. Then my neurosis got the best of me. Did I really have good content yesterday? That is kind of cocky isn't it? Maybe I haven't had good content in a while, or at all? Good content last week? You tell me; subscribe! Either way, the button is here!

http://ourcrookedtree.blogspot.com/2008/07/good-content-yesterday.html

http://ourcrookedtree.blogspot.com/2008/07/waiting-is-hardest-part.html

It’s a question that’s been around since the beginning of advertising: Anyone can write, so why the heck do I need a copywriter? Actually, there are many reasons for hiring a professional writer. Real Estate Professionals have to spend money at every turn; web site hosting, printing, sings, food for open houses. Using a copy writer for each project may not be in the budget, but one may be beneficial for specific projects. Here are the top ten reasons why:

1. Copywriters are to words what musicians are to notes. Or sculptors are to stone. Or, you know, baristas are to coffee beans.




2. Good ideas are hard to catch. Copywriters bring a big net.




3. A good design with poorly written copy is like chocolate ice cream with sawdust sprinkles.




4. Copywriters know how to use alliteration, allusion, assonance, onomatopoeia, gerunds and prepositional phrases. The rest of us barely know what those words mean.




5. If a picture is worth 1,000 words, the right words can be worth 1,000 sales.




6. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but the wrong words may kill your marketing.




7. Copywriting is the poetry of sales. It’ll make your customers go weak in the knees.




8. A copywriter bends the laws of time and gravity: saying things with half the words and twice the impact.




9. “Proper words in proper places, make the true definition of style.” – Jonathan Swift (See? Only a writer could write that.)




10. Good copy is agile, quick and deadly accurate. Yep, copywriters are word ninjas.

*With over 8 years assisting agents market their listings, Crooked Tree Press can help you work more efficiently so you can do what you do best. Get Listings!